Disclaimer: All
characters and events in this blog are fictional, irrational, and
superstitious. Any resemblance to real characters or organization,
superstitiously or irrationally, is surely due to psychiatric problems
Day 1
Location:
Conference room
Time: 9 AM, 1st
Jan 4000 BC.
CEO: The
contract has been signed, we have to complete the coding and testing
fast, the Go Live is in 7 days. System should perform well, we are
expecting a load of around 10 billion users.
Team lead:
But! We do not have enough resources, we have just 5 developers and 3
testers!
CEO:
How many do we need?
Team lead:
To go live in 7 days we need 10 developers and 7 testers!
15
developers (creature with hunch backs and 4 arms) and 10 testers
(creatures with 4 eyes and 1 arm) get spawned.
CEO: Fine, get on with the
work, mail me a status update at EOD.
Location: Team lead's desk
Time: 5 PM, 1st
Jan 4000 BC
Team
lead typing on his Mac -
Dear
CEO,
We
have completed the code for instantiating the Heaven and the Earth
objects.
As
per the design specifications provided by you, the constructor for
Earth class is kept public and for Heaven it's private. We will be
programming further tomorrow and fix if any issues are raised by the
testers.
Regards,
The
Team Lead.
Location: A tester's desk
Time: 5.15 PM, 1st Jan 4000 BC
Tester logging a defect on the defect management portal.
Defect Type: Show stopper
Defect Description: The connection between Earth and Heaven fails
with Socket Exception
Steps to simulate:
- Instantiate Heaven and Earth Objects.
- On the Earth's portal, click on “Go to Heaven” Button
- The screen redirected to “Sorry, no connection found”
Expected Result:
“Welcome to Heaven” Page should be displayed.
Day 2
Location: CEO's Cabin
Time: 10 AM, 2nd Jan 4000 BC
Team Lead: My Apologies but
we are little confused with the tasks you have assigned us for
today... regarding the firmament stuff... we need to separate water
with firmament in-between, but the design specifications are not
clear about the ratio at which the division needs to be done, will it
be 50-50 or 10-90 or 90-10 or something else.
CEO: hmm, what?
Team Lead: aah... water....
how much for heaven and how much for earth?
CEO: ah right, put it on
earth, we drink other stuff anyway.
Team Lead: all of it?
CEO: did you ask something?
Team Lead: Never mind.
Location: A developer's desk
Time: 3 PM, 2nd Jan 4000 BC
Developer adding comment on defect management system.
Comment -
Invalid defect, not able to simulate using the steps provided.
The heaven object fails to get instantiated, there's no Socket
Exception.
Please close the defect.
Day 3
Location: A Developer's desk
Time: 11 AM, 3rd Jan 4000 BC
Team Lead yelling
Team Lead: Why is this
object spawning a tree?!! Did you read the emails I sent?!! I told
the seed object should instantiate a new tree and not leaves!!
Developer: I will fix it
right away sir, (developer drags some stuff on his S-shaped curved
6DLED Screen), here it is.
Team Lead: No!!! Not that
way!! The seeds should validate on the 'type' private variable. The
mango seed won't instantiate a banana plant! Fix that!!!
Developer: Ah sorry, ya
fixing it!
Team Lead: hmm ok, get it
tested today!
Location: A tester's desk
Time: 4 PM, 3rd Jan 4000 BC
Tester logging a defect on the defect management portal.
Defect Type: Major
Defect Description: Unexpected plant growth
Steps to simulate:
- Instantiate a plant object of type grass
- Cut the grass into half.
- Take the bottom half, called root as per design document
- Invoke the plantInSoil function
- Grass grows.
Expected Result:
Plant should only grow from seeds as per design document
Day 4
Location: CEO's Cabin
Time: 10 AM, 4th Jan 4000 BC
Team Lead: This is so weird requirement! Why you need us to
provide the client with two different lighting systems? And... we
need to schedule it at 12 hours? We will need multi-threading for it, we already run two threads, one for heaven and one for earth, now you
want us to run two more threads for sun and moon? Why can't we just
keep a fixed sun, why rotate them periodically and that too at
different frequency? It's an overhead.
CEO: That's a good idea, separate threads for the stars would
be good too.
Team Lead: What! No!!! Stars are redundant, why even have
them?! And what's this no moon night that's in the contract? Why have
the client agreed on having a no moon night and having just some dim
stars? They will just use up the CPU resources without giving much
throughput!
CEO: So, do you have any more questions?
Team Lead: More Questions? I haven't got any answers for the
things I asked!
CEO: Fine then, mail me a status update before EOD.
Location: Team lead's desk
Time: 5 PM, 4th
Jan 4000 BC
Team
lead typing on his Mac -
Dear
CEO,
We
have completed the code for instantiating the Sun, the Moon and the
Stars.
As
per design the Moon is kept little dimmer than the Sun, which enables
the user to also view the stars at night. For the day time, we are
applying a CSS style on the firmament to hide the heavens which might
be visible from earth due to sun's brightness. Please review the
following code -
.firmament
{
background-color:
skyblue; //suggest any other color if you like
}
Regards,
The
Team Lead.
Location: A tester's desk
Time: 5.15 PM, 4th Jan 4000 BC
Tester logging a defect on the defect management portal.
Defect Type: UI
Defect Description:
Some parts of moon are missing on some days and a rabbit shaped
shadow is visible on the moon which might be causing the low light
conditions on earth.
Expected Result:
Moon should be round and uniformly lit.
Day 5
Location: Office Canteen
Time: 1 PM, Lunch time, 5th Jan 4000 BC
Developer 1: Can you believe, if our code works tomorrow, we can have
flying creatures.
Developer 2: You mean birds?
Developer 1: Ya! And swimming creatures too!
Developer 3: And running creatures too!
Developer 1: I am so excited!
Developer 2: But did you see, we have some crawling creatures in
design too, it doesn't make sense! Why some creatures will crawl when
others can fly?
Developer 1: Common! It's more fun to have a variety!
Developer 2: But it's so unfair to the crawlers!
Day 6
Location: A tester's desk
Time: 5 PM, 6th Jan 4000 BC
Tester logging a defect on the defect management portal.
Defect Type: Minor
Defect Description:
Some of the building components of some creatures are unreliable.
Steps to simulate:
- Instantiate a tortoise object
- Invoke the Run function
- Increase speed till 100 miles per hour
- The instance variable 'leg' throws CantRunFasterException
Expected Result:
Creatures with legs should be able to run at any desired speed.
Day 7
Location: Conference Room
Time: 9 AM, 7th Jan 4000 BC
CEO: Is the scanner ready?
Team Lead: Yes Sir, let's
take your image.
CEO
climb on the specially designed 3D scanner and the Team lead presses
some button and gets the output as serialized objects on his Mac.
Team Lead (to a developer):
I need you to make two deep copies of this scan into type human, set
one as gender type female with the left scan and gender type male
with the right scan. Also get the compatibility test done. And ya,
set the immortality parameter to false.
Developer: Roger that!
CEO: Wait! Skip the
testing part. It's already the 7th
day, no more time for testing and other stupid stuff. Make it live as
soon as you are done with coding!
Team Lead: But sir, we have
some defects pending, we haven't done a load test, we are expecting
around 10 billion users hitting the Earth thread in just 10,000
years, what if the system can't support?
CEO: Don't worry we have
other plans, we can use distributed computing and use our other
server Mars if needed. We can also keep some backup at Moon, I know
it's a lighting system but we can manage.
Team Lead: Fine.
Location: Conference Room
Time: 11 AM, 7th Jan 4000 BC
System Goes Live!
Celebrations all around in office.
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